What if I told you there is a way to dissipate all your pain and discomfort without sex, drugs, alcohol or porn? Would you believe me? I doubt it.

Well there is as a matter of fact. It's your ego that craves, needs and wants so when you identify with your ego you don't have a chance at peace.

No matter what you feed your ego it is never satisfied. So you're at the whim of every compulsive desire that arises. No control.

For 20 years I was ruled by compulsive desires. I was addicted to porn.

It was an enjoyable escape from the arising of life's challenges. Negative emotions are escaped easily this way especially for the masculine.

The orgasm is the most potent form of stress relief for the masculine. But it is only temporary so it's not an effective solution.

Additionally there are major side effects to a porn habit which I learned first hand over the course of 20 years. Some of the side effects are:

-Arrogance

-Restlessness

-Low confidence

-Low motivation

-Overactive mind

-My self esteem slipped away

-Loss of arousal to real women

-I was highly irritable and moody

-Anger sparked in me easily (irritability)

-I was unable to relate and talk to beautiful girls

-I carried guilt and shame (due to the hidden secret)

Needless to say I was in up to my neck with personal turmoil. All that I knew was a life of living through my ego.

I just wanted what I craved all the time; however I didn't have a lot of motivation to get it. That's why porn was the easy path of least resistance.

10 years ago I had a conversation with my spouse at the time about my restlessness and how my mind would not rest. She recommended the book "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle.

I gave it a read and put the principles to practice immediately. I started to incorporate meditation into my week as well.

The changes didn't last very long before I was back to the same old state of mind. My ego re-asserted itself so I was back to my old ways and habits.

I knew that my spouse at the time didn't appreciate my porn consumption so I made the effort to minimize use. That didn't really help matters because the habit remained.

It wasn't until I realized our relationship was too damaged to fix that I needed to address this bad habit. Our relationship broke in the process. It was already too late.

This sparked an unrelenting will in me that has not stopped since that time. For 4 years I studied the ways to manage my sexual energy and I applied all of them to find the truth.

To this day I stand to say I am porn free and haven't looked back. I am no longer ruled by the compulsive desire of lust.

I still find women attractive but instead in a more healthy way. I also go long stretches without sex and I'm fine with that.

I've realized divine masculinity to greater heights than I imagined possible. I never thought I'd be able to overcome my porn habit.

It was so difficult to imagine life without it. It was a tough journey but I wanted it so I made it happen.

Now I interact with others with new found confidence because I've purified my vibes. I've realized that I need nothing outside of me to bring me joy and peace.

This means I no longer have cravings for porn and that I've found a sense of wholeness within me. I transmute feelings of loneliness through self acceptance and tapping into my true self (my essence identity rather than my ego) .

The practice of connecting with your deeper (true) self in itself is a method of transmuting all negative emotions and thoughts. Many thoughts and emotions cause pain but when you live from your deepest self you no longer attach to the pain.

You simply observe it but no longer identify with it because you are rooted in your deeper identity. You are not your body, your emotions or thoughts. You are your soul and it's through that realization that pain is seen as the illusion that it is.

When you learn the practices to connect to your deepest self you are no longer ruled by your ego. Your ego keeps you wanting, needing and desiring more always.

It keeps you at the surface always wanting more from the outside world. It's a conjurer that creates a lack mentality.

Go deeper to rule your emotional states and no longer identify with them. This gives you leverage on all bad habits and escape routes.

Essentially when you escape you're escaping your egoic self. The self that is lonely, sad, depressed and anxious because it wants to be somewhere or somebody else.

It creates the illusion of lack. To realize your wholeness and completeness you must find it in the deeper dimension. It's the most forgotten dimension yet the most powerful.

It transcends thought, emotion and the human aspect of you altogether. You then operate from a deeper place and begin to create your life from an empowered state rather than a needy one.

So how do you make connection with your deeper (true) self?

The Soul Connection Framework

1) Focus only on what you're doing

This means letting go of thoughts you have of the future and past. If you're doing the dishes, just focus only on washing the dishes. Do not allow thoughts to crowd your mind.

The Zen masters call it the radical refusal to harbor thought. It puts you in that Zen state in all that you do. The quality of your life increases when you are only in the present moment.

Your ego is master at telling you that you have more important things to do or to think about. It keeps you out of the moment of life which is all there truly is.

Try going about your day with complete focus on each task you're doing without bombarding your mind with thought. It is a more peaceful state and the quality of what you do goes way up.

As time passes the quality life you lead rises.

2) Thoughtless awareness

This is the idea of living life without conceptualizing everything. Your ego always wants to be evaluating everything and giving things meaning.

For example when you're looking at a flower your ego will want to define the flower, give it a name and break it down to characteristics. This takes away from the raw experience.

The soul (the real you) observes without judgement in the pure state of the moment. Your ego is the analytical aspect of you which clouds the truth of your perception.

It's constantly producing thought forms to attach meaning to things.

The truth is actually a feeling and not something that can be explained or dissected down. It’s where the experience of looking at a flower becomes ingrained and woven into your soul as an emotional understanding.

Emotional understandings are the depth of truth. It's wisdom which goes beyond the intellectual mind.

The intellectual mind is useful but limited. Thinking is needed at times when relaying information to other people.

It's needed seldomly though and not anywhere near as much as people think on a regular basis. In fact 91% of the 70,000 thoughts we have in a day are the same as yesterday... and the day before that, and the day before that even.

So back to the flower example (last time I swear). Your ego fills your mind with thoughts about the flower which bombards your mind with content. With a bombarded mind you no longer have clarity.

Constant mind chatter takes away from peace and clear decision making.

But without those continual thoughts arising in your mind you are operating from the real you (the soul). This is the deeper self.

3) Meditation

Meditation is a great way to relinquish all thoughts, emotions and excess baggage that comes with your egoic mind. Sit in silence and observe yourself.

Self observation is the foundation of living from your deepest self. It is living life from the soul rather than the ego.

This is why meditation is so powerful because it is conducive to connection to the deeper, calmer most powerful self. It connects you with the tranquil yet infinitely powerful you.

The gnostics have explained that the more you meditate the more "aha!" moments you have. Meditation can be tedious but every bit of effort is worth it.

The most powerful aspects of life cannot be measured. They are intangible like the real you (formless).

You are not human you are much more. This is why Jesus said you are in this world but you are not of this world.

4) First in the mind then in the reality

What this means is that all manifestations you desire stem from within you. The kingdom of God is the present moment. It’s present moment awareness.

When you are connected with your deepest self you are aligned with the kingdom of God. You first surrender to the present moment (the only time that exists). Then you envision what you wish to manifest and feel it as though it is real now.

This is the recipe for creating life by your own design through intention.

Summary

This concludes the tools for awakening to your deepest self. With practice you gain leverage on bad habits and direct your life from a clear mindset.

In clarity you find your life's purpose and when you follow your life's purpose you're a high value man. A man's purpose in life is his mission.

Finding your life's purpose becomes more clear as you tap into the deeper you. This state of depth permeates all areas of your life into a more enjoyable existence.

Not only does it massively increase your ability to overcome addictive patterns but it also allows you to dissipate pain quicker. You no longer cling to negative emotions.

For instance if you lose somebody or some thing, you can detach from it. You no longer identify with the disappointment of loss.

You observe it for what it is with full acceptance and move forward in peace. Your ego on the other hand, wants to create reactivity to life's happenings which only amplifies problems.

So instead of amplifying life's problems you will begin to dissipate them through non-reactivity. This non-re-activeness stems from the deeper self.

The real you who is unperturbed by the external world.

With these tools you can find a deeper level of consciousness to bring into your every day life. These tools offer you massive leverage over the quality of your mind and reality.

It is the gateway to peace and tranquility. It always starts within.

If you'd like guidance on these tools I offer 1-on-1 counselling to help you truly connect with your deepest self. This will allow you to create your life from a place of wholeness into your greatest potential in love and business.

I have been practicing this for 10 years. I'm happy to share how I came from being tense and restless most of the time to calm and present.

Please reach out on any of the social media links below to setup a free call to discuss. And if it makes sense for us to work together further we will talk about it on the call.

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I put out articles once or twice a month on how to become a high value man in body mind and soul. I teach you how to embrace your independence and become irresistible to quality women.

Until then stay high value.

Peace brothers,

-Kristien (Kush Wood)